Wednesday, November 6, 2013

Outside In, Inside Out

Reading through posts on Facebook this morning I came across this image. It was linked to a post over at Unveiled Wife. The image really struck me because I've never looked at it that way and it's so very true. I don't think it's always the case, but certainly more often than not, arguments do indeed happen when two people passionately defend themselves.

Now what really struck me was a comment under the photo from someone I do not know. It was totally profound and will likely have an impact on my thinking for the rest of my life. A commenter said this: "We see ourselves from the inside out while our husbands see us from the outside in." Oh my!!!! I feel like this was said just for ME. I can't tell you how often I feel that what I say or do gets interpreted totally different than how I see it. Tim and I have had many arguments over the stupidest things simply because of him seeing things from outside and me seeing things from inside. I know where my heart was when I said or did something, but he doesn't share the same perspective. Very often I tell him that I feel he only sees the worst possibility in my words or actions instead of seeing how something could be positive. That has GOT to be because he can't see it from the inside like I do.

I'm not blameless in this either. I know that often times I do the exact thing to him. This is something I'm going to work diligently to change in myself. Not only changing how hurt I am when I feel he misinterprets something but I'm also going to work on not assuming the worst in him.