Monday, January 31, 2011

That flew right out the window


Day two of the Love Dare is to show kindness..... Uh huh... Well it was all going well almost all day long until about midnight. GRRRR


I get ready to do my Bible study in  preparation for meeting up with my friends tomorrow and can't find my Bible, the study book, or my notebook. Seems that my little Breanna moved them for me :). I sent Tabitha off on a search for them and after a few minutes we located the Bible but not the rest of the stuff. Since Breanna was still awake in her bed I called her down and asked her about them. Of course she doesn't remember. Hmmm... why would I think she would. In the mean time the hubs gets up to help look. He frustrates me because I have to bring the website that I had just closed back up to show him what the book looks like (maybe if he were more interested in my life he would have KNOWN what the book looks like - just one of the negative, untrue thoughts that popped in my head during my frustration). HE looks on the book shelf after the 13 year old has already looked up there. Then Breanna says maybe we should compare all the pictures of the books to that one (all the books on the shelf to the one on my computer) and off she goes and she pulls it out..... right on the BOOKSHELF that a 13 year old girl and 42 year old man had just looked.

So, I explain to my husband that I really did appreciate that he got up and helped but that it really does cause more frustration for me when he offers his brand of looking. Hmmm.... he got upset. Wait a minute, aren't I the one who is upset? I was simply offering an honest assessment of his "help". No too KIND huh?

Then I ask Taba to grab my highlighter off another bookshelf. It's a special highlighter that I went out of my way to purchase last payday and it cost almost $5. It's one of those ones that doesn't show through the page. I use it on my Bible and my school books. I put it on the bookshelf on Thursday and my girls were being helpful and cleaned up the living room. Tasha likes to throw everything in the middle of the floor and then tell Taba to put stuff away where ever it goes.

Tabitha, true to form, puts it where only God knows! I think I'm more upset about that than I am the whole other situation cause well.... she's been told time and time again to simply put things where they actually belong and instead she does what she normally does, being upset that she is actually having to clean just throws them where ever and well, I'm tired of being disrespected like that. I simply want her to learn to respect others.

I haven't been too kind to her tonight either.

So, the patience that was supposed to carry over from  yesterday and the kindness that was supposed to start today flew right out the window. Maybe I'll get it right tomorrow.

PS... I described the situation not to disparage my family or make any of my family look any particular way or be taken in a negative light. I fully believe that as wives we should honor our husbands and in showing that honor we shouldn't talk bad about them to other people in case people take only what we say and form an unjust opinion of them. I illustrated what happened today as an slightly amazing example of the state of my mind today while ATTEMPTING to complete day two of The Love Dare. I think it's great that he got up and at least tried to help... however, while this was going on I didn't think it was quite so wonderful or helpful since he missed it :)