Saturday, June 12, 2010

A Sweet Song

Speak out to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, offering praise with voices [[a]and instruments] and making melody with all your heart to the Lord,... Ephesians 5:19 AMP


I had the opportunity to attend a womens event at our church tonight. I must say that it's a good thing that my friend Alicia agreed to go with me because I loath going to anything like this by myself! We arrived a little late and when we went in they had already started. I was still unsure exactly what this was going to be. All I knew is that we needed to bring a desert to share.

I was very pleasantly surprised! After we had our desert they did a door prize drawing (VERY thankful that I did NOT win - it's another issue of mine, I hate the attention being on me), and then we started singing! I LOVE to sing. I can't say that I'm very good at it but it does not stop me from belting those words out. Back home in Savannah I was in our church choir and I really loved it.

To me singing is the perfect praise and worship. It also ministers to my soul. No matter what is going on in my life when I enter church and we start singing all my concerns vanish. All except one. Do you ever feel like you're being led to do something but you just can't? Like standing in church at the end of a sermon and the pastor is doing an alter call and you're just gripping the pew in front of you. Used to happen to me ALL the time. For some reason I would feel pressed to go pray at the alter IN FRONT of everyone else! And I never could bring myself to let go of that pew. Now it's a little different. I want to worship Him with my everything, with total abandon, but I can't. Almost every single Sunday I feel myself being led to lift up my arms to Him and I can't even lift my hands at my sides let alone lift them into the air. For some reason I always think that the people next to me are going to think I'm crazy (my husband and children especially since they KNOW me and all my sins).

Is my inability to do this one simple task holding me back from passionate worship? I think it may be and I think it all relates to humility or rather my lack of humility. Someone once said to me that being humble is simply the willingness to be obedient to the will of the Father, regardless of personal cost. Yep, that pretty much sums it up, I lack humility in a big way and He just keeps showing me that over and over.

So, even though I didn't make any connections with any of the other women tonight, I enjoyed myself and felt closer to the Lord when I left. Also, as you can see by the way this post went, I learned something as well.

3 comments:

Connie said...

I am so proud of you Brandi. You truly are growing more and more into this wonderful and loving person that I am in awe of. I couldn't be more thankful that you are growing closer to the Lord and I am sure as you do you will become what the Lord wants you to be. Your are a wonderful and loving daughter, mom ,wife and friend. I miss you dearly and wish you were home but do realize that you being away is making you into the woman you are today. You are an inspiration to me. I love you. Mom

Cindy said...

Brandi, You're also a niece.I'm very proud of you. Love you, Aunt Cindy

Forever Neighbor said...

Ahhhhhhhhhhhh I am so proud of you *tear in eye* :) I wish I could of went with you the other night but we had a BBQ that night. Oh by the way; Throw those hands up to Him who cares if people think you are crazy, He doesn't (and I don't think you are crazy either, well just when you walk with a mission...lol)
Blessings!!!!

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